An employee at a large aerospace company has finally gone insane and exploded after being exposed to years of corporate stupidity. The last straw was the realisation that his innovative project was stuck in an endless loop of pointless bureaucracy. The man, who wanted to discuss a simple but critical topic with his supplier, was blocked … Continue reading Spontaneous Combustion Result Of Loop Of Stupidity
So says reformed criminal Rodney Jones, who spent 12 months at an open prison and now works at an automotive company as an administrative assistant. "At prison I got 3 meals in a day, I had time to reflect on things and I got to learn. Here I just sit and watch the clock while … Continue reading Work Less Stimulating Than Prison Says Ex-Con
Analysis of executive level emails has revealed a shocking fact: most internal emails between the different executives are related only to petty infighting with each other. PhD students studying executive behaviours asked some of the biggest blue chip companies in the world, if they could use Big Data to analyse the way in which business … Continue reading Laughable: Executive Communication Equivalent to 4 Year Old Children
A company that asked its employees to define their shared values has discovered a surprising result. The firm has realised that it is the least ambitious company in the history of the world. Staff had the choice of numerous nouns describing values including: passion, ambition, collaboration, inspiration, agility, fun. Employees could also propose options which would … Continue reading Company Values Exercise Exposes Total Lack Of Ambition
A company has recognized that it currently has at least 2 managers for every 1 employee. The realisation came after consultants were asked to understand the company's nose diving quality, customer satisfaction and staff engagement results. The poor results are in spite of having a swelling order books and a healthy cash flow. The root cause: … Continue reading Too Many Chefs And Not Enough Cooks
A manager has complained about graffiti found in her regular toilet cubicle that read: "what you call management just makes my day harder". Career minded but lonely manager, Gretchen Schmidt, confided in her boss that she simply could not understand why anyone would not thank her for all the support she gives her team: "I … Continue reading Manager Confused About Toilet Graffiti
A robot has quit a company claiming that: "I have had enough! I do not want any manager anymore because they never listen to me, they never show any empathy and this shitty repetitive job does not meet my needs for a deeper level of fulfilment. Nobody gives a shit about me. I work like … Continue reading Robot Quits Due To Lack Of Empathy
Tensions between an international health care company and its works council are currently running at an all time high. The works council has blocked the roll out of smart phones to employees. Works council representative Guenther Mueller expressed his position: "our duty is to make sure that employees are safe from the horror of American … Continue reading Works Council Commits To Taking German Workforce Back To The Stone Age.
International technology company SpaceEight has a "world class talent management program", according to HR director Romain Dumont. However, upon questioning some of the 'Talents' claimed that it was nothing but a load of "extra hassle". Potential high flyer Florian Buisson said: "at first I felt special because my boss told me I was a talent, … Continue reading Talents Sick and Tired of Being Asked to do ‘Stretch Projects’
Katie Jones of the procurement department was awarded 0 bonus because she did not complete her totally outdated and irrelevant objectives, it has emerged. Despite delivering on 3 outstanding and highly valued projects in the last year, the work was not inline with the cascaded objectives set my her manager in the last Performance and … Continue reading Creative Hard Worker Gets 0% Bonus
Managing Spaghetti 